Autaar & 404

In de Kiem Gesmoord

Online Addendum

Thoughts, inspirations, sketches, and all kinds of creative insanity that went into this album.

Cover artwork for the Autaar & 404 album “In De Kiem Gesmoord”

Welcome to the Addendum.

This page explores the thoughts behind the album In De Kiem Gesmoord, a collaboration between solo acts 404 and Autaar.

As each of us adds thoughts, internal dialog, and prose, we enrich the listening experience for the reader.

You can take a listen, and get a copy of the album over at the Autaar Bandcamp Page.

Have fun!

~Autaar & 404

  1. M.S.I.

    I was intrigued by this article in the Guardian where people are having Tourette-like symptoms because they watch people who have Tourettes or tics.

    The idea of not only copying tics that you see, but also making your own and not being able to stop doing these is an interesting thought, coming from someone with Tourettes.

    Is it all in my head? Is it all in their heads?

    The songs starts out as a brutal nightmare but ends as an easy going coma that you can’t seem to escape.

    No matter how hard you smash that like button and subscribe to the channel.

    (And if you read this be kind and share this non-sense on your preferred social media platform and ruin the algorithm.)

    Locked in a room, locked in a house, locked in a street, locked in a city. The only way out is in, as I explore the inner spaces of despair and loss.

    An image of an image of an image

    I feel locked inside myself, too. Feeling even more alone now, because the world has torn, it seems.

    Everybody has started calling it “The Situation”. These semantics remind me of talking to refugees, speaking on the invasion, the hidden war, their inevitable flight.

    A beast of razors behind the curtain. Fangs slightly touching the silk. Tiny tearing noises from a terrifying silhouette. Air filled with astringent fear. Scratching at the back of your mind.

  2. Heroes anti heroes

    Will I save cost by making this component for fridges or will I be part of the environmental destruction of the Earth?
    Will I be pleased enough by having trillions of dollars or do I need more and create World War 3?
    Shall I save this country from poverty and misery or shall I buy Twitter?
    You’re so vain, you probably think this song is about you!

    The original idea was to make something with a cello bow on a guitar and slowly expand on that without it becoming a big mess of layers or typical drone fest.

    So tried to play the parts as subdued as possible and made a little addition here and there.

    Our star, shining down.

    The signal slowly moves into capacitive focus. Resonance from another realm exciting eddy currents within. Humans leave their trails across the stars, painted in eternal light.

    In the din of electromagnetic nature, we oppress our silence onto the resonances in the sky. Our grubby tentacles have always been reaching out. In light, in water, with waves and blockades. Well before we became arrogant we were already dangerously voracious.

    This track is like a photograph, taking the once-was and engraving it onto another domain.

  3. Living apart, together


    Mark made the brilliantly angry black metal main riff and I wanted to go against the rhythm and made this nasty doom-y sounding riff that made the track feel like rowing on high seas against the waves.

    The whole song sounds super claustrophobic like you’re locked in a small room with a lot of sounds banging on the doors to come in.

    As I am torn between murder and flight, I explore the musical details of having an emotionally stunted and underdeveloped neighbour. One who decides to start playing super-loud techno at random times throughout day.

    Is it because he wants to assert dominance? Does he want to feel seen? Perhaps he’s just high on cocaine again?

    I can’t take it anymore.
    Fuck. No!
    Please, just stop.

    The noise. It invades both mind, heart, and sleep equally. Not only is it a death sentence to any kind of mental work, it immediately throws the hard-won feeling of ‘home’ to the blazing, ash-filled wind. The invasion is especially hurtful because I came here looking for peace and quiet, and only very recently at that. He shows no insight. “You need to subjugate,” he tells me. “Because I’ve lived here longer than you.”

    Visions cross my mind’s eye: Hellfire, charred bodies, disemboweled, cut in half, raised on an inverted cross

    Subjugate? Am I a dog?

    Trying to stop my imaginations of scooping out his brains with a nearby screwdriver, I stand at a crossroads: Start a war, or accept the natural order?

    I can’t do this to my loved ones, I cannot hurt this person. That leaves only one way forward.

    A map of despair
    Please, no.
    We need to move house.

    Is this running away, or life-goal stability? Is this weakness, or acceptance of Nature unchangeable? Why do I have to ponder this proposition? What forced me to this decision?

    Why don’t I just give up?

    Some people are truly better of dead. My neighbour? May he live a long, long life.

    As such a glorious life it is: Scared, lost, lonely, addicted.

    He is already in hell.
  4. Finely tuned abandonment

    I was sitting in my room and was just, like, staring at the wall thinking about nothing.

    Suddenly, my mom came in, called me, and I could not hear her over the sound of my headphones, so she started shouting my name!

    404! 404!

    I said: What?

    She said: You’re on drugs!

    No, mom. I’m not on drugs. I was just thinking.

    All I want is a pepsi. Just one pepsi!

    And she wouldn’t give it to me!

    Just one pepsi!

    Are we together?
    Our committed bond?
    Is this our family?
    Yes babe — Check out my onlyfans.
    My altar within the great church

    Turns out I had lost track of how to be human. I became a mind, disconnected. A mind with wants and needs of human form, yet abstract in its senses. Working through it, accepting time as ever-flowing and my eternal companion. Change inevitable, the true fabric of reality. I learned to accept and love the cyclic imperfect: The revolving, evolving, swirling hum beneath it all.

    It is like the duct tape of the Universe. It holds our cosmos together. The drone is within and without.

    As above, so below.

  5. Van Henk moest ik crypto kopen

    I knew crypto was kinda of a scammy thing when I saw a “how to invest in Bitcoin” help book in the check-out section of my local supermarket a few years ago.

    Perhaps calling it ‘scammy’ is too easy.

    Yes, it could be great — But it turns out to be just another way to speed up the destruction of our environment.

    In any case: when those books come popping up at the low, low price of 10 euro’s at your local supermarket, you know the investment jig is up and you get screwed over along the way.

    And no: I currently do not have NFT’s.

    Basement Dungeon

    My contribution to this piece was made while watching the football World Championship and seeing advertisements for owning and using crypto flashing by.

    The piece was recorded a few hours later in my newly made basement dungeon.

    It will come as no surprise that the Melvins served as (an) inspiration for this song and I tried to bring the nauseating sludge-ness of repetition into this song and at the same time let it morph into variations and a wall of noise at the end.

    You try to ignore the immeasurable stone mass floating above you. Dread shadows promise crushing nothingness, forgotten eternal.

    “No!” you say, “There is no death here, there can’t be!” — Convincing no one but yourself.

    Centuries have filled the vault with ancient ashes. The floating corpses of the buried wealthy touching you. Tickling the back of your neck with decomposed feet.

    Hollow windows, like broken teeth, up there. The torn rags of empire’s flags calmly waving in stone halls, above.

    Floating above you, threatening all.

    This is my cathedral.

  6. Wachtend op mijn extra-scherpe tosti…

    Mark send me the basic track, and I made some drone-y sounds with a device called Distant Voices —which is a kind of theremin— played through a ton of effects.

    It sounds like it comes from space, and with Autaar’s organ it could be the soundtrack for an intergalactic survival/preservation mission.

    I hope Musk and Bezos will have this on their playlist when they fuck off from earth for good.

    Fuzz Pedal

    The ending is a noise-fest orgy with a fuzz pedal.

    I like this fuzz pedal a lot.

    It destroys all the subtle nuances of the guitar tone and replaces it with angry bees and noisy fuzz.

    Just like this record will do to your mind.

    I have completely rebuilt this track four times. (Thanks Joost!)

    This is not really a typical style composition for me, and I would almost categorize it as being poppy, were it not for the screeching synths, the theremin, and the truly goosebump-invoking guitar work by 404.

    For me, and for many others that hear it, there seems to be a glimmer of hope in it. A rising from the ashes, a regain of control.

    Well, this track is about grilled cheese sandwiches, after all — which is definitely something to be positive about!

    But to stay serious here for a bit: I love this track deeply. It is chronologically the last one we made, and I really think we found our vibe together here, It just works so well.

    It feels like this track breathes a new, hopeful beginning. Something we could all use, right about now.


New album In De Kiem Gesmoord by 404 and Autaar is available on all streaming platforms.


Update — CD is now available via: